Dweezil. Moxie Crimefighter. Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen. Pilot Inspektor.
Those aren’t the names of the latest video games. They are, in fact, names of real people. Children of celebrities, to be precise.
It’s not an uncommon thing for parents to want a unique and singular name for their brand new bundles of joy. And they will guard that precious name with their lives until it’s time to reveal it. Celebrities are no different, it seems. And through the years, they have given us some of the most unique, interesting, creative, outrageous, and quite frankly, the weirdest baby names you might come across. And we love them because, well, it suits them. At least they know they’ll be the only Dweezil in the class.
Without further ado, here’s a list of the most unusual celebrity baby names — in alphabetic order for your reading pleasure.
Apollo Bowie Flynn
Apollo Bowie Flynn is the child of Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale.
We should also note that Apollo’s siblings are Kingston James McGregor and Zuma Nesta Rock. Basically, they’re all destined to be rockstars just like their parents.
Apple is the child of actress Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin. And no, her brother’s name isn’t Banana – like he’s never heard that before. It’s Moses.
Audio Science is the child of (and therefore named by) actress Shannyn Sossamon. We’re just gonna leave this one right here.
We can only assume Elle MacPherson named her child Aurelius because she is a Roman historian. That, or her favorite movie is Gladiator.
Banjo is the child of Rachel Griffiths. We hope he plays.
Bear Grylls may not be the adventurer’s real name, but Bear Blu, child of Clueless actor Alicia Silverstone and musician/actor Christopher Jarecki, is 100% a real name.
However, Bear Blu may be a little dismayed to learn that he is not the only Bear in the class. Bear Blaze is the child of Kate Winslet. Grrrr.
Power couple Beyoncé and Jay-Z made waves when they announced that the name of their first child was Blue Ivy. People everywhere were shocked, because have you ever truly seen ivy that was blue? Nope. Us neither. Blue Ivy’s siblings are named Rumi and Sir.
(Also, we should mention that The Edge from U2 has a child named Blue Angel. So there’s that.)
Bluebell Madonna and Montague
‘Ginger Spice’, otherwise known as Geri Halliwell, named her children Bluebell Madonna and Montague.
There’s a song in there somewhere. Most likely written in iambic pentameter.
Sleeping Beauty must be Rachel Bilson and Hayden Christensen‘s favorite Disney princess, or why else would they have named their child Briar Rose? Personally, we would have gone for Belle.
Bronx Mowgli and Jagger Snow
Ashlee Simpson named her children Bronx Mowgli and Jagger Snow. Do you think they go around singing to each other “I got the moves like Jagger” and “I wanna be like You-oo-oo?” We would. We totally would.
Denim (and Denim’s sibling Diezel) are the children of musicians Toni Braxton and Keri Lewis, who clearly love their jeans. And gasoline.
Destry is the child of filmmaker Steven Spielberg and actress Kate Capshaw. Quite the equestrian, or so we gather.
Egypt and Genesis
Voted most likely to be best friends with Moses Martin are the offspring of Alicia Keys and Swizz Beatz: Egypt and Genesis. But really. We expected more, Swizz.
God'Iss Love and Heaven Love'on
God’Iss Love is the second child of singer Lil’ Mo. Not to be confused with Lil’ Mo’s first child, Heaven Love’on.
Interestingly, Lil’ Mo’s other three children are named Justin, Jonah, and Karl. We just imagine the teenage years went something like this:
LIL’ MO: Justin, who told you you could do that?!
JUSTIN: God did.
Rapper T.I. (known as Clifford Harris to his mother) named his child Heiress Harris. It has a nice ring to it, actually. Say that three times fast.
But of course, Jermajesty.
Jermaine Jackson hit the nail on the head with this one.
Yep, you read that right. Nicolas Cage gave his child the name Kal-el, which as most DC Comics fans can tell you, is Superman‘s real name.
So then why in the name of Krypton does Kal-el Cage voice the Young Bruce Wayne in Teen Titans? Sacrilege.
It’s like David Duchovny and Téa Leoni just gave up thinking of a name and decided to just call their kid, well, Kyd.
Moon Unit, Dweezil, Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen, and Ahmet Emuukha Rodan
Frank Zappa definitely wins the award for the most unique names given to all of his unwitting offspring: Moon Unit, Dweezil, Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen, and Ahmet Emuukha Rodan.
Diva, okay… but Thin Muffin Pigeen? The kids in school must have been merciless.
Moxie Crime Fighter and Zolten
Magician Penn Jillette named his children Moxie Crimefighter and Zolten. Let that sink in.
Pilot Inspektor is the child of Jason Lee and Beth Riesgraf. It could have been worse. They could have called him Inspector Gadget.
River Rocket Blue Dallas
Celebrity chef Jamie Oliver had a few interesting ideas for naming his kids as well: namely flowers and food. River Rocket Blue Dallas being one, but he also named his other children Poppy Honey Rosie, Daisy Boo Pamela, Buddy Bear Maurice, and Petal Blossom Rainbow.
How would you feel if, first of all, Michael Jackson was your father, and secondly, he gave your sibling the name Prince Michael the II, but decided to call you Blanket?
Rosalind Arusha Arkadina Altalune Florence Thurman-Busson
Rosalind Arusha Arkadina Altalune Florence Thurman-Busson is the child of Uma Thurman. Makes you glad you didn’t have to learn to spell that in Kindergarten.
Yes. Sage Moonblood is the obvious choice for the child of Sylvester Stallone. As is his other child’s name: Seargeoh — pronounced ‘Sergio.’ Naturally.
Speck Wildhorse is the child of John Mellencamp and model Elaine Irwin. We can’t decide what we would rather be called, ‘Speck’ or ‘Wildhorse’. Hm. Tough choice, really.
Rob Morrow named his child ‘Tu’. Yep. Tu Morrow. Now that’s just mean.